What should i do, where should i live?

ok well my parents got divorced whn i was 9 and when i turned 12 my mom moved to new jersey and i want to move with her ,well she came back when i turned 13 and now shes different she gets on my nerves but i still want to go to NJ ,i love my dad and his family but i want to go start a new life,and yessterday my mom made me soooo mad that i pushed her my bros werent there, i regret pushing her i cried all night , i want my old life back, my mom is so depressed here in cali thats why she changed shes going back to NJ during summer vacation, but i dont know if should go, i need some advice